You’re tired of dating. It’s exhausting. You’re not finding the one and very possibly deep inside there is an inner fear that lingers. It’s quietly saying that you’ll end up on this cycle forever.
So you do what you know. You go on date after date. Except there are no results. There is no boyfriend. And now you’re met with what I call, dating burnout. So you take a break only to find yourself defeated and too tired to get back out there.
Tired of dating? 4 Ways to Make it Enjoyable:
1. Stop saying yes
The word no is self-care in disguise. I had a client who told me she was tired of being set up by family and friends. She felt bad and a bit of FOMO (fear of missing out) saying no. So she would say yes but wouldn’t be excited to go on the date. This prevented her from finding the one.
Keep in mind, ya don’t have to say yes to every date opportunity. I can promise that you won’t be missing out. Although, it’s important that you do say yes to viable opportunities that you actually want.
In addition, it’s important to check in with yourself. Make sure you’re not saying yes or no out of fear. If you say yes because you feel like you “should” be going then rethink your yes. Otherwise, you’ll bring that energy subconsciously on your date. No bueno.
2. Get specific on what you want
Put your damn self first girl. It doesn’t matter how long or how short you’ve been single. What matters is that you know exactly what you want. This will give you a very clear idea of how you want to strategize your dating game plan.
Disclaimer: When you can separate what you “think you should be doing” with what you actually want to be doing then magic within occurs. AKA (also known as) it’s called gaining confidence because you know what you want.
3. Create boundaries
My client recently felt she wasn’t being polite if she ended the date on her terms. Let me clarify. That’s not being polite that is people pleasing. Being polite on a date is showing up on time, not interrupting your date, and not being on your phone.
Just because you go on a date with someone doesn’t mean you have to stay until they initiate the goodbye. Creating boundaries is a great way for you to practice self-respect. When you can decide for yourself what you want and act on it you’re putting your needs first. So if you’re not enjoying yourself it’s ok to close out the conversation after 1 cup of coffee.
4. Practice being present
When you’re on a date and immediately deciding if he’s the right person or not then you’re not being present. Naturally, no matter how good you are at multitasking you can’t be two places at once, even if it’s in your own head.
Being present means that your focus is on your date. Really listen to what they’re saying. Don’t worry how the goodbye will go or if you’ll see them again. If you don’t stay present and use this time to truly learn about the person then you’ll miss out creating a true connection.
Want more ways to NOT be tired of dating? Let’s chat, girl!