It can be easy to paint those red flags green on a first date. Sometimes these guys are perfect on paper so naturally we want it to work. When you mix red and green you get yellow which is still cautioning you to yield for good reason. Top 10 first date red flags:
1. Talks about himself the entire time.
You are not on this coffee date to have a sales pitch. You are on it to get to know this person. If he does not stop talking about himself without asking questions then jump ship. This indicates that he doesn’t have the consideration of your presence.
2. Brings up the ex.
Surprise! The guy you’re on a froyo date with has an ex. If she comes up beyond “I moved to LA with my ex and now I am working in blah blah” fine. If she comes up in detail, save the drama for your momma.
3. Is overly generous.
There is nothing more uncomfortable than a guy asking you every two seconds if the food is ok or if you’re warm enough. This on repeat is a sign that he is not listening to you the first time you answered that your food rocked.
4. Leaves the bill to you.
Look I am all for the modern day women who can support her own needs or if chivalry is her choice fine no judgments. If he left the ENTIRE bill to you, that’s not ok. This shows his lack of respect for you and your monetary needs.
5. Dishes on falling out with friends.
Sure, we all have a friend situation that at one point we went our separate ways. It’s life, it’s people, it happens. If he talks about falling out with a friend and is blaming everything on the friend then he is pulling the victim card. This translates that he can’t take any responsibility for his own actions. Buh bye!
6. Talks about his materialistic items.
If you’re out to dinner and he says “I like nice things” and continues on about his Porsche 911, he is boasting about himself. If he drives a super sexy sports car no problem but bi*ch be humble, please.
7. Rude to the waiter.
There is nothing worse than a date that talks down to the wait staff. If he acts like the people who are bringing out his cheeseburger and french-fries are at his beckon call, be aware. This could mean he holds himself on a class system level.
8. Does not make eye contact.
Part of connecting with someone is being able to look into each other’s eyes and have a conversation. If he can’t even look you in the eyes, he’s probably distracted. You want someone who values your beautiful presence in front of him.
9. Talks about other dates.
You two are on this date for a reason, because you’re only focused on you two. Leave others out of the equation with no questions asked.
10. Demands you come back to his place.
This may seem obvious but it’s not always so. If your gut is telling you that you should go home for the night then do it. If he continues to pressure you to come over for a few minutes, follow your gut. You’d rather be safe than sorry.
Sometimes we want to justify the red flags. It is ok to throw up your white flag. There are plenty of green flags in the fields.